Bad Cats, Good Dog

Warming Up

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I never thought I’d be offended by anything on Netflix, but they really managed to get to me today via the email I got first thing.

“We’ve added something you might enjoy.... Alley Cats”

Really Netflix? Do you think so poorly of me?

I’ve taken great care to only watch the best comedy on your service, hoping you’d see me as someone with great taste who likes 30 Rock, Community, Bojack Horseman, early Rick and Morty.... why would you do this to me?

It’s like an elderly aunt you’ve never met saying, “You like comedy, don’t you? I bought you the Mrs Brown’s Boys book.”

You have an algorithm for a reason Netflix. Come on.

I posted my disappointment online. With Netflix. I couldn’t risk watching Alley Cats for fear of what that would make Netflix think I might enjoy next.

We’ve added something you might enjoy... some snuff movies.

We’ve added something you might enjoy... trans people being pelted with stones.

We’ve added something you might enjoy... a work in progress by Chubby Brown.

We’ve added something you might enjoy... a vomit draft written in 3 minutes of an episode of How I Met Your Mother performed by Tommy Wiseau from The Room.

Actually I would like to see that.

Perhaps predictably some Ricky Gervais fans found my comment on Facebook and relentlessly defended him, proving that James Acaster was right when he said people were OK with jokes about trans people but not ready for jokes (vaguely) about Ricky Gervais.

Some of them were offended on Ricky’s behalf, which is weird for fans of the comedian who doesn’t care who he offends. Too challenging for you, am I?

Am I jealous? That’s what some of the fans claimed. But if you joke about stuff you’re jealous of, what does that say about Gervais and trans people? ... interesting.

There is some stuff of his that I certainly admire. The Office was great and surpassed by the first series of Extras in my opinion and I’d happily watch him laying into movie stars at award ceremonies all day long. I’ve not done anything in my career to touch those heights.

It’s a shame when someone gets these opportunities and then does something lazy and hack (again only seen clips and reviews - maybe the show is actually amazing), though again his fans were keen to point out how much money Ricky would make from this. Though you’d hope that wouldn’t be his main focus given his current financial standing.

Anyway my beef isn’t with him. Maybe a sweary Top Cat improvised in an hour by top comedy performers will turn out to be great. My beef is that Netflix does not respect my exquisite comedy taste. I am not offended by a cat saying cunt. It turns out that is just a direct translation of meow. Which makes a lot of sense. Gervais is a visionary.

I had the best time talking to Susie McCabe. As I will discuss tomorrow I’d had some bad news just before the gig, but was able to cry with laughter for an hour which really helped.

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Wolfie with her good friend Spider-man

We had hoped we’d get a couple more months with her and I really didn’t want this to happen when I was away (though I said my goodbyes before I left), but Wolfie left us yesterday.

It’s very hard to be away at a time like this. I’d have liked to be with Wolfie when it happened and be with the family after it happened. I did Facetime her before my show and though she was a bit out of it her ears did prick up when I called her a good girl.

If my religious views are correct she will be waiting in Stone Heaven for me, ready to clear those elysian fields. She was my best friend and a part of the family and being away from it all I am finding it very hard to process. Obviously everyone is very unhappy. But I can’t fully process it and haven’t properly mourned yet.

It’s strange having to just carry on trying to make people laugh after this, but it’s helpful for me too. Yesterday, talking to Susie, knowing that the vet was due to arrive at our house when the podcast ended was very unsettling. You don’t get a precise countdown with a person unless they’ve made the trip to Switzerland or are about to be executed for terrible crimes.

She was such a great family dog and member of the family and podcast co-host. RIP Professor Wolfenstein. We will miss you so much. Thanks for being such a sweet and loving presence in our lives.

Cats and dogs can be friends. Wolfie with the already departed Smithers.

Slightly worried I might be joining her soon though, as I’ve unsurprisingly picked up a bug in Edinburgh. So I guess we get to find out how well my immune system has recovered. I hadn’t slept all that well, but woke up with a sore throat and feeling a bit lousy (after having felt so fit for the rest of the week). Typically this happens on a weekend where I am doing four podcasts in two days.

The two I did today were utter joys. Obviously I’ve never down two RHLSTPs in the same day before so history was made. Lovely to see Felicity Ward again and the biggest crowd of the run so far and then two and a half hours after that one had finished I went up to the turd shaped W hotel to talk to MC Hammersmith and was forced to deliver my emergency questions like Scatman John in stuttering fashion.

Edinburgh on weekend nights is a lot to cope with. Last night a man lunged at me in the street with something in his hand. It turned out it was a phone. Say hello he drunkenly slurred at me. I don’t think he’d recognised me. Just wanted a friend to get a hello from random passers by near the Royal Mile. I said hello and moved on. So tonight I was delighted that I was too knackered to do anything else and just went back to the hotel and had an early night. Hopefully I can shake it off quickly. This has scuppered my attempts to up my fitness regime each day. I was going to do Park Run this morning.

Maybe next week.

Place your bets on whether I’ll manage that now.

Coming up on Sunday 9th another double header with Finlay Christie at 2pm at Stand 3 and Amy Matthews at the W Hotel at 5.30pm. Also Flo and Joan can’t do the Wednesday show so are now doing Sunday 16th. Contact the Stand if you want to change the date of your tickets. All details here.